| Time: | October 10, 2006 - 1:21 pm |
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everything is going great with me and brian...
otherwise i'm freaking out.. i have bills to pay and no money to pay them.. i'm not really doing good in the fucking one class i'm taking right now.. my mom keeps threating me and my dad keeps telling me to just move back home. i'm breaking down very slowly and i'm scared i can't take it anymore by myself.. I NEED HELP! i'm falling apart
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StarGazer.
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| Time: | June 29, 2006 - 2:32 pm |
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alright so for people who can't read..
- Work can't give me off except the 4th and 5th.. i'm not coming home for like 4 freaking hours and then driving back.. that would be POINTLESS..
- The wedding i'm going to is in September.. that would be the next time i can take off work.. after that its November for thanksgiving and i'm staying down here for christmas..
got it???
any other questions??? tho i don't have to justify myself to anyone
if you want to see then how about you come down here???
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4  StarGazer.
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- Can't come home when i wanted to because work can't give me off.
- My mom might have colon cancer.. and i'm not excited..
+ i get to go to Spokane, Washington in September as well as Seattle and all those fun places around there for a wedding. finally get to go somewhere not on the east coast.
+ MY PARENTS ARE COMING TO VISIT ME!! <33
+ I'm almost done unpacking my apartment.. i think i have two more boxes left.
- too busy to really do much.
+ making lots of money.
+ Schools almost over. i have one exam tomorrow and i'm done with this semester
me and brian are still going strong. our 1 year is coming up and actually we'll be in Washington for it. I'm soo excited. He really is my best friend right now. i talk to him about anything and everything.
i guess the next time i'll be home will be in November.. i can't really come up there until then because of school and work. and i need money like i need oxygen. i have five different bills i have to pay each month. and then my mom wants me to take my cat. which i really cant right now. i have two major roads right by my apartment and people down here don't stop for anything. and i don't have the money for it. I honestly love living on my own. But i HATE bills. Though me and Brian might be moving. To where i don't know. Which is fine by me because i kinda am getting bored of Gainesville. But i'm not going to be moving home anytime soon (even though my dad keeps asking me when i will be moving back in.) I love my freedom. and i love being away from everything. i don't have drama i dont have anything to worry about except bills. i'm in love with the greatest guy i've ever met and we plan on spending the rest of our lives together. Right now i couldn't be happier. I'm stressing a little but thats normal. School is stressing. but i'm so excited to go to Washington and meet brian's friends. and i'll stop rambling.
++withlove++
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2 StarGazer.
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i want to starve myself until i'm back to 110..
i want to dye my hair so that its super light brown..
i want to shake this stupid depression state of mind i've been having lately..
i want to not go to bed feeling like i'm losing touch with everyone..
i want to take a REAL vacation and stay in a hotel and go to the beach whenever because its only a walk away..
i want to trust new people without second guessing it..
i want a million dollars so i won't have to live pay check to pay check.. worrying about if i'm going to have enough money for groceries.
i want people to come visit me.. and to enjoy themselves in the process.
i want everything in my life to be on track so i won't have to worry anymore..
i want to feel loved by the people that i love..
i want to feel like i just had the best time of my life.. and hold on to that memory until the next one comes..
i want this to be the end of my love life.. he makes me soo incredibly happy..
STRESS KILLS!!!..
not having a free second to just relax puts people in a depression state of mind..
only having one person to trust is driving me crazy..
only having one person to hang out with sucks when they're busy..
working and going to class everyday takes its toll on ones body..
this is me just being critical on myself. things i want to change and am in the process of changing.. i don't need or want an opinion from anyone. but if you feel you need to then leave a comment
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3 StarGazer.
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| Time: | April 07, 2006 - 10:02 pm |
| Mood: |  sick. | | Music: | SOS - Rihanna. |
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so right now i've been living with a kidney infection and its not fun.. i worked last week on thursday and friday and made some lovely money.. this week i worked on wednesday and well my legs felt like they were going to collapse on me but i made it through and made 82 bucks. tomorrow i'm working a pool party and then going to this bar-b-que at brians' parent's house cause his grandparents are in town so its going to be like all his family in the area at the house.. should be interesting but his family is really cool and they all make me feel welcomed. right now i think i'm going to take a shower and then go to bed i'm a little sleepy. damn that medicine oh well its life.
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4 StarGazer.
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| Time: | February 27, 2006 - 5:18 pm |
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so easter is still a month away i know but i figured i'd let you guys know i'm coming home for it
april 14-19.. maybe.. i don't know i have to talk to brian about it.. and see how long i can take off at target
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StarGazer.
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Work:
so the bar got new owners.. they're pretty cool i guess.. they're
kinda young and they don't seem to know what they are doing we dont
dance on the bar anymore which is alittle upsetting but at the same
time its a nice change i got a second job working at Target i make
6.50 an hour plus i get discounts and a pay increase as i go so this
will be good extra money in my bank account so i can go on trips and
stuff with the boyfriend or go shopping..
love life:
incredible. to me he is the picture of perfection. i swear sometimes
he has A.D.H.D. but its funny we act completely stupid when needed
which is all the time. but we can talk about everything. he makes me
feel like i'm home [though i still miss it]. 6 months in March and it
feels like 6 years.
my life:
full. going to be working everyday. but at the same time i hang out with
friends. party. go bar hopping. some cattiness but that gets solved quick
and the party continues.
Friends:
home: i miss them.. i can't wait to see them. hopefully sometimes soon.
I'M COMING HOME FOR EASTER.. and bringing Brian with me!
here: krystina is doing good.. she got a new boyfriend; new friend kelly
is funny as crap ex-cheerleader as well so we talk about that. and shes
a party girl so me her krystina and everyone go out and dance.
at the moment i'm sick.. which sucks but i'm taking medicine trying to get better
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StarGazer.
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| Time: | January 19, 2006 - 11:38 am |
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since lauren gave me the nudge..
alright so..
+ moved into my apartment and everything
- in the process of painting my room
+ me and brian are fantastic, like really good, (he claims we're going to get married)
- krystina had some boy drama but its all better now
- i had drama at work cause they were bumping me back to a dancer everytime a bartender comes to try-out which is shitty
+ its getting warmer down here which means tank tops and flip flops
+ my parents came to visit and bought me a bed (so comfortable ;})
- i'm breaking out which blows
+ warm weather = motorcycle ride! =)
+ warm weather also means friends come to visit!
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5 StarGazer.
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so yesterday me krystina and brian went to look at apartments..
alot of the places we went to were closed but we kept driving around
i was getting so tired.. but we went to look at a couple more
well the last one we looked at was perfect two bedrooms the same size
(reduces fighting cause one room is bigger then the other get it?)
open kitchen, washer & dryer in apartment, free tanning bed, free cable hookup
ceiling fans, walkin closets, nice size living room.. 460 a month so i'll still
have money to get groceries and stuff. i'm so excited my own place (well
with roommate but thats cool cause she doesn't annoy me)
i move in on sunday January 8th at noon =)
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StarGazer.
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| Time: | December 30, 2005 - 10:23 am |
| Mood: |  cranky. | | Music: | josh gracin - stay with me(brass bed). |
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so..
came home for christmas. which was definitely better then my thansgiving break.
got everything i wanted for christmas + something extra from my mom
-got a new laptop from my parents(aka from my dad), its really nice and kind of expensive but its perfect for when i start school and doing all that stuff
-got a portable dvd player from grace for my 12 hour trips to and from florida
-got plane tickets from anna so i wouldn't have to drive
-got a game cube from claiborne for my new apartment
-got pj's from my grandma(which i'll never wear)
-got perfume and socks from my aunt and her new husband
-got a star named after me by brian(cause i'm massively obsessed with the stars)
........+$50 gift card to victorias secret that i still have yet to use
-got the rollercoaster tycoon game plus water park expansion pack(that i can play for 5 hours a day and not care)
-got a coach purse from my mom + matching wallet
i got..
-my mom these little things that she likes
-to look for my dads(maybe i'll give him like a couple hundred bucks for helping me out)
-to get anna something which will be kinda hard cause she has everything
-grace the burberry wallet she wanted
-to get claibornes still
-brian the track jacket he wanted plus the coach wallet he wanted for his birthday (my mom bought him a jcrew peacoat to replace the one that got stolen while he was visiting his friends on the air force base in washington state)
hung out with my Ps4L girls (minus chelsea cause she was sick, which made me sad but added nicole which was cool)
watched the 40 year old virgin and had jagger bombs and baileys and pizza. man i missed them and i'm glad this break was better then the last. hopefully they'll come down for spring break!! *hint hint* =)
hung out with my mom while i was there just talking about how great everything is going down here, although i have to move out of where i'm at by tomorrow or sunday so i'm moving into brian's apartment until me and krytina get ours which will be sometimes next week or the week after i'm excited to get my own place.. though i'll have a roommate thats fine cause there will be two rooms. plus krystina is just as goofy as i am so things will be good as long as we both stay financially stable.
not sure if i'm starting school on january 20th or not cause i haven't heard anything from the school about scheduling or anything which isn't really that fun cause i want to start school
put my car in the shop cause my fans weren't kicking on and my car was over heating.. which sucks cause i don't have a car.. and i need one to get to and from work and everything
worked last night which was kind of boring cause not that many people are in town cause people graduated and the new students haven't gotten in yet.. so it was kind of a slow night
and i'm out..late
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3 StarGazer.
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| Time: | November 17, 2005 - 11:23 pm |
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whoopie i'm home for a vacation and to see my friends and family.. and yet right now i'm ready to hop back in my car and head back to florida.. some homecoming.. all i want to do is cry.. straight off the bat i get made fun of by anna and grace.. get a hug from my mom and dad.. my cat ran away from me.. goretex growled at me.. met my moms new puppy.. adoreable.. my brother gave me a hug when i got out of my car.. its SOOOO cold here.. i want the warmth.. yesterday i was wearing a skirt and flip flops to day i'm wearing a sweatshirt.. this sucks ass.. i want to be with brian and i want to be working.. i have so much fun at work.. i could be making money right now instead of sitting my ass in my dad's computer chair and typing this..
fucking A ..
well i'm home for 10 days...
tomorrow - doctor's appointment at 9:30am, after that i'm going to verizon and getting a new phone, then harry potter at 8 <3 =)
saturday - ??..i have no idea
sunday - thinking about going to see NVA practice but not sure..
monday - hair appointment at 1:30pm should be fun
tuesday - doctor's appointment at 10:30am
wednesday - ??..
thursday - I GET TO GET FAT!!! Turkey Day =)
friday - beats me..
saturday - i'm praying so hard brian can get that day off of work and he can come up here
sunday - maybe just hanging out or heading back to florida..
let me know if you want to do something on any of those days
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10 StarGazer.
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man life is soooo good.. i never wanna leave here..
i'm finally living life without drama cause down here people don't give a shit..
if you wanna get away from the dramam of whatever for a little bit feel free to visit me in gainesville i'll show you the town and all the cute boys i know in it.. most of them work with me =)
missing home though and all the people that are there best friends my parents MD loves my kitty[though i might get a new one down here i'm excited..] my brother and siter..
leave one if you feel like it.. if not ttyl
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3 StarGazer.
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alright starting the week off at wednesday cause monday and tuesday were boring..
wednesday - woke up late like 4:30pm got up took a shower laid around for like an hour and a half before actually getting dressed got everything together for after dance practice called krystina to remind her to bring clothes so we could out to Rue Bar after practice get to dance practice learn like 3 more dances go upstairs to our dressing room and do hair and make up change and head out with anna roxy and krystina get to rue bar at like 9:30pm nobody there so we went to jewels met up with aj[so hott] left there and went back to rue bar at 10:30pm saw my buddy Jeremy[old security guard worked at the library quit and went to rue bar] talked to him for a little bit.. met back up with anna krystina roxy aj his two friends justin[security guard] and acouple other people.. we all got completely wasted that night.. yea..
thursday - finally ended up falling asleep at like 10am woke up at around 5pm with a killer headache took aloooooong shower.. went to work at 9pm.. walked around and passed out flyers for like 3 hours came back to the bar and danced the rest of the night.. went home and slept..
friday - woke up at like 2:30pm.. talked to my mom for a little bit about the week and everything.. went shopping at 5 to get my outfit i needed to work in the club room finally found my outfit at 8 yea i had to wear all black.. needed pants and a top .. umm.. got to work at 10 when i needed to be there at 9:30.. worked the club bar until 12:30.. ran to the dressing room and changed into my skirt and library shirt danced for an hour and 15 minutes came home and slept
saturday - woke up at 3pm.. ate some brunch watched a movie had anna call me at 5 to tell me i had to get to work at 6:15.. yea got there at 6:30 .. nobody came until like 8:30.. had dinner at 9 other bartenders started showing up at 9:30-10 danced and was the cocktail waitress for VIP tonight.. yea that was interesting.. closed out cleaned bottles the usual.. got home at 3am.. and now i cant sleep and i have to bring sharon to the greyhound station in two hours..
i'm tired.. what a week..
comment if you must
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4 StarGazer.
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so today i didn't have to work.. definitely woke up at like idk 3:30ish in the pm.. was incredible to sleep in that late normally i'd have to wake up at 12:30-1 so i can get everything done before work..
normal work day..
-get home around 3:30am
-sleep in until 12:30-1 if i'm lucky until 2
-shower
-hit up the mall, clean my room or do laundry
-cut up shirt for work..
-get to work at 5:30 do make-up
-get off work at 2:30-2:45am
-unwind for like 15-30 minutes
-get home at 3:30 [and the cycle continues]
my job is so worth it tho.. not for the money but just the fact that i get to meet a crap load of new people every night.. and the people i work with are awesome as shit. kinda sucks that one of the security guards left and won't be back until like november.. he was my buddy we did the air guitar when i worked Club Insomnia dang oh well i got his number before he left last night we're gunna hang out when i'm up in VA cause hes there like 30 minutes south of richmond.. i'm starting to rethink the december move back and switching it to a june move back.. i honestly dont want to leave gainesville.. its so much fun down here and living with my sister isn't bad at all i'm enjoying this experience and i will prolong it as much as possible.. sorry guys.. JUST COME VISIT ME.. and if not then damn i'll stay down here longer cause being up there wont be worth it
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2 StarGazer.
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| Time: | August 30, 2005 - 11:36 pm |
| Mood: |  blah. | | Music: | tv. |
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saturday- me and anna drove to georgia to see Ashlee Simpson.. she was amazing live it was great.. Ryan Cabrarra was there watching in the tent two rows behind me... it was funny he got up in the middle of Barefoots performance and went to the bus but everyone was watching him go even the guys in the band were looking at him..
sunday- went shopping in orlando..
monday- went to back to orlando with anna and her fiance' and my boss Frank [he owns the house i'm staying in] and went to pleasure island and went to all the night clubs there and danced until like 2am stayed at a hotel
tuesday/today- woke up at 11[check out time] got an extra hour for the room.. went to ihop then me and anna stayed down in orlando and went shopping again.. got matching belly button rings and we're thinking about matching tattoos.. should be fun.. then well i've been laying around ever since..
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5 StarGazer.
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| Time: | August 26, 2005 - 6:08 pm |
| Mood: |  geeky. | | Music: | NOW AND THEN DUH!!!. |
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i think you could only talk to a best friend through smiley faces and on the phone at the same time!!
( Read more... )
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1 StarGazer.
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Back
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over joyed.
overly excited.
tired.
exhausted.
happy.